He gives and he takes away.

I have been entrusted with a lot of important things in my life. But nothing brings on great responsibility like being entrusted with souls.

One of my deepest instincts is to protect others, especially those in close proximity to me and my life on the daily. God has blessed me by entrusting many souls into my care over the years but some have left a bigger impact than others.

This past summer I got to work with people that I would do absolutely anything for. I lived and worked and studied Jesus with them for an entire month. God allowed me to be used in their lives and I learned how to love, protect and teach them the things God has taught me.

Through them, He changed my life.

And In return I set about protecting them from any danger - physical, emotional, and spiritual, that I possibly could.

Jesus worked in all of our lives in huge ways over that month. But that time ended.

I remember distinctly walking through the airport by myself for the first time in a month, and feeling absolutely paranoid. It should have been freeing to not always be making sure my people were good, but instead I felt frantic. I was so invested in protecting these people that it felt like my heart had been suddenly spread across the country.

I floundered. I felt useless. I wanted to continue to protect my people and to be there for them but they were all thousands of miles away.

The Lord was asking me to walk away from my mission. I had done a good job. I protected them from many things, seriously some of them would have actually died, but now it was time for me to let go.

He was asking me to trust him and to sign off from that mission. It was no longer my job.

My heart didn't like this though. After all- life had been pretty good. I was doing what I loved and we were all becoming more and more like Christ. I couldn't see why he wouldn't want that for me and my friends.

But there are definitely reasons why. First of all when you are holding on to something, no matter how good that thing is. You are tied to that thing. God can't give you with anything else. You can't serve him in any other way.

Secondly, he wants us to trust him. He wants us to willingly give him the things we love. Like when God asked Abraham to sacrifice Issac. God didn't want a human sacrifice, we know that is against the nature of God, he wanted Abraham to be willing to give it. He completely understands how much we love things, people specifically, he loved us so much that he died for us so he definitely understands our human love. He doesn't just want to take good things from us. He wants us to be willing to give it. He wants us to say “You give and you take away. Blessed be the name of the LORD.” - Job 1:21.

He gives us material for sacrifice.

For more information about material for sacrifice read Passion and Purity by Elisabeth Elliot.